Drop the stone
Don’t Let a Critical Spirit Steal Your Joy
Philippians 2:14-15 NLT
Do everything without complaining and arguing, so that no one can criticize you. Live clean, innocent lives as children of God, shining like bright lights in a world full of crooked and perverse people.
Discernment recognizes something that is wrong because it wants to help, heal, protect, or improve.
A critical spirit develops a habit of looking for what’s wrong.
And if we’re not careful, criticism can become so normal that we don’t even realize we’re doing it anymore.
A critical spirit doesn’t just affect the people around you. It changes something inside of you.
Before you become an expert on somebody else’s faults, examine your own heart.
1. A Critical Spirit Blinds You to the Good
Numbers 13:27-28 NLT
This was their report to Moses: “We entered the land you sent us to explore, and it is indeed a bountiful country—a land flowing with milk and honey. Here is the kind of fruit it produces. But the people living there are powerful, and their towns are large and fortified. We even saw giants there, the descendants of Anak!
A critical spirit magnifies what’s wrong and minimizes what’s right.
Philippians 4:8 NLT
And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.
2. A Critical Spirit Damages Relationships
Ephesians 4:29 NLT
Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.
Every time you speak to somebody, you’re doing one of two things:
You’re building something or you’re tearing something down.
Proverbs 18:21 NLT
The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences.
Galatians 6:1 NLT
Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself.
Spiritually mature people don’t just care about being right.
They care about restoring people.
Before you say something, ask:
“Is what I’m about to say going to build this person, or am I simply releasing my frustration?”
People don’t need you constantly reminding them of everything that’s wrong with them.
They need someone who can see what God is developing in them.
What would happen if the church became known more for being encouragers than critics?
Never underestimate what encouragement can unlock in somebody.
3. A Critical Spirit Reveals Something in Our Own Heart
Matthew 7:1-5 NLT
“Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. For you will be treated as you treat others. The standard you use in judging is the standard by which you will be judged. “And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own? How can you think of saying to your friend, ‘Let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye.
Jesus is saying:
“Before you examine everybody else, examine yourself.”
Sometimes what irritates us about everybody else isn’t really about everybody else.
It’s revealing something happening inside of us.
Luke 6:45 NLT
A good person produces good things from the treasury of a good heart, and an evil person produces evil things from the treasury of an evil heart. What you say flows from what is in your heart.
“What you say flows from what is in your heart.”
Sometimes we need to ask:
“God, what’s happening in me?”
It’s difficult to look down on someone when you remember how far God reached down to save you.
John 8:4-7 NLT
“Teacher,” they said to Jesus, “this woman was caught in the act of adultery. The law of Moses says to stone her. What do you say?” They were trying to trap him into saying something they could use against him, but Jesus stooped down and wrote in the dust with his finger. They kept demanding an answer, so he stood up again and said, “All right, but let the one who has never sinned throw the first stone!”
Everybody around her had stones.
Jesus had grace.
They saw a sinner deserving condemnation.
Jesus saw a person worth restoring.
Drop the stone.
Because the closer you get to Jesus, the more aware you become of your own need for grace.
And people who know they need grace become much better at giving grace.
We have to change what we’re looking for.
If you’re looking for something to criticize, you’ll find it.
What happens when we intentionally start looking for the good?
James 1:19 NLT
Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.
James tells us: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.
Before we criticize, we need to slow down.
Before you say it, ask three questions:
Is it true?
Is it necessary?
Can I say it in love?
Sometimes the most Godly thing you can do is simply not say it.
Three Things to Remember:
A Critical Spirit Blinds You to the Good
A Critical Spirit Damages Relationships
A Critical Spirit Reveals Something in Your Own Heart
Psalms 139:23-24 NLT
Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you,and lead me along the path of everlasting life.
Jesus didn’t call us to become professional fault-finders.
We are called to be grace-givers.
Don’t become so good at finding what’s wrong that you lose the ability to celebrate what’s right.
Let's put down the stone.
Pick up grace.
Choose encouragement.
And become the kind of person who leaves people stronger after they’ve been around you.